My family started going back to church a few months ago and part of the sermon this past Sunday struck a chord with me. It occurred to me that a lot of my positive outlook with my fibro comes from my faith. From faith come hope and acceptance. I don't believe that my faith will cure my pain but it does give me the strength to cope and thrive in spite of it.
I believe in God and I believe in prayer. I pray that doctors and researchers use their God-given talents to find a root and a cure for fibro. I pray for strength and I pray for relief. I may not get my answer in the form of immediate absence of pain but what I get is a calmness of soul and the peace that comes with that. I try not to spend time wondering "Why me?" or feeling like God has punished me. Bad things happen and the important part of life is how you deal with them. I know, easier said than done. For whatever reason I've never tended to blame God for bad things. I don't know why they happen but I know God is there to help us through them. Losing faith means losing hope, and that means losing the means to deal with the pain.
Going to church has become it's own form of therapy for me, I've found. I was hesitant about returning to church for a number of years because I thought getting the boys (children and husband) ready and out the door would be nothing but more stress to deal with. I felt like family time at home was better. I was wrong. My kids don't always jump for joy when it's time to get dressed for church but Big Red says he enjoys going and helps encourage his little brother. When we get there and get settled into a pew it becomes family time. There we sit, side by side, surrounded by the warmth and love of God and the congregation around us. Nothing needs to be done for that hour. We listen, we sing, and we fellowship. Then we go out for lunch and enjoy each other's company. And so the first part of every Sunday is spent being together and being still. It is relaxing and recharging. I wish we hadn't waited so long to return (Obi-John and I met in church years ago).
I may not agree with everything that is said; I may not enjoy every hymn. But I feel God at church and I can carry that feeling with me more easily elsewhere. I know without a doubt that if I didn't believe in God and I didn't have faith that I would be miserable in my illness and hopeless in my pain. I don't know where I would find the strength to seek and create happiness for myself and my family. I would feel defeated. So take this all for what it's worth--I have discovered that this is the ultimate secret to my positive outlook and determination to be happy. Gentle hugs, FibroMIGHTS!
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